In twenty-three more days...

...my baby girl will be ONE YEAR OLD!! I know I've said it (about 3 million times), but I have to say it again...WHERE DOES THE TIME GO? I can remember vividly the night I had her. It really does feel like only yesterday.

I remember sitting on the couch in my living room watching the coverage of the courthouse shooting in Georgia when Dad came to pick me up to take me to my appointment. I remember dropping off my "sample" to the Quest Lab. I remember sitting in the rocking chair at the Perinatal center waiting for my ultrasound...reading my book (that Shawn bought for me with the advice that I should wait to read it until I was admitted to the hospital so I'd have something to keep me busy).

I remember feeling (first) excited to see Keira on the screen of the ultrasound machine, then terrified as the technician went to get the doctor. I remember how quickly everything happened...how upset I was that Shawn wasn't there yet, but how glad I was to have my Dad with me. He was so calm and reassuring (like always) reminding me that it would all be ok, and that God was in control.

I remember sitting in the waiting room watiting (while they cleaned my room) to be admitted....Shawn coming off the elevator...Dwayne arriving, then my mom, Rob and Lisa, then Holly and Jeff. I remember how long it took (and how painful it was) for the nurse to start the IV. I remember my family leaving for dinner, and having to call Shawn back because they were going to take me to surgery ASAP.

I remember how quickly everything happened once Keira's heartrate dropped and the decision was made to do a C-section...I was shaking and felt faint. I don't think I even felt the epidural needle in my spine. I remember wondering if it was too late to just change my mind and go home...wondering if I was really ready to be a mother. All of the fears and doubts that I hadn't had during the course of my pregnancy suddenly flooded in.

I remember being wheeled into the delivery room (at 9:04 pm), and Shawn trying to watch over the drape as Dr. McBride worked to deliver Keira. I'll never forget hearing the doctor and nurses marvel about how "tiny, buy mighty" she was...or that cry of hers...and her strawberry blonde hair.

The best memory of the day my life changed forever was the moment Shawn placed Keira in my arms for the first time. She was so tiny, so beautiful, so amazing. It was all so surreal, such a wirlwind of activity... One minute it had just been Shawn and me, and the next we were suddenly responsible for another life. The 5 days we spent (and the 6 she spent) at the hospital were days that I'll never forget...the isolette, having to go to the nursery to feed her, the NICU, her first bath...

And the first week or so at home when I took her temperature before every diaper change and feeding, carefully recording every detail in a notebook...

How our lives have changed, and how blessed we are that God worked his miracle to bring Keira to us! I remember thinking how different it might have turned out if I'd gone into labor on my own...how I spent too much time worrying about what could have gone wrong instead of just enjoying what went right... I look back now and realize how unnecessary that all was.

It's amazing to me to watch her grow and change and learn new things. Every day she does something new...she's developing into such a funny child already. It's so neat to watch her play tug of war with Max, and to give Mommy and Daddy kisses... What a wonderful life!

And now we're planning her first birthday party. March 11 will be here before we know it. Shawn picked out the birthday party invitations and decorations from BirthdayExpress.com. Now we're just waiting for them to arrive so we can send them out in time. I still can't believe my BABY will be a year old!